Maxine’s efficiency, humour and enthusiasm, her overall competence as seaman, navigator, translator, ship manager and negotiator are beyond doubt. But she is not a perfect person. Little Miss Imperfect, as Bill has noted.
Maxine’s Achilles Heel is her striking tendency to self-harm. Our 4 month journey from White Sea to Black Sea has been enshrined in a rich tapestry of bruises, abrasions, contusions and sprains which cover her elegant body. Tactfully, some of these have been referred to in previous posts.
After last night’s Tainui Award Ceremony I was expecting more self abuse but she (we) got home unscathed. With quiet relief I thought that we had finally seen the last of these futile gestures of hers.
But Maxine’s attacks on herself come unexpectedly and unannounced. They are often dramatic. Take yesterday’s quail’s egg incident, for example. On her last day aboard I was sitting in the cockpit minding my own business when there came a shriek from the galley. God, I thought, she’s at it again. And indeed she was.
In a spectacular piece of self-aggrandizement she had managed to empty a pan of boiling water over her arm. The boat was motionless at the time and we cannot imagine how she managed to do it. But she did.
An icy cold bottle of vodka in the fridge was used (unopened) to limit the injury but local dressings, paracetamol and a bottle of wine (opened) were needed for symptomatic relief. Maxine survived. More importantly, so did the quails’ eggs.
Max departs for Simferopol and Moscow today and I am hoping (silly me!) that there will be no more of these gestures before she steps ashore.
As if this gorgeous woman needs to go to such lengths to attract attention.
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